You Don’t have to Be quite – all kinds of skirts，dress

So the other day, people in the comments were speaking about leggings. I’m quite agnostic about leggings, however the whole discussion (which centered on the truth that it can be *really* difficult to look great in leggings) got me believing about the pervasive concept that women owe it to onlookers to preserve a specific basic of decorativeness.

Now, this may seem unusual from somebody who composes about quite gowns (mostly) every day, but: You Don’t have to Be Pretty. You don’t owe prettiness to anyone. Not to your boyfriend/spouse/partner, not to your co-workers, particularly not to random guy on the street. You don’t owe it to your mother, you don’t owe it to your children, you don’t owe it to civilization in general. Prettiness is not a lease you pay for occupying a area marked “female”.

I’m not stating that you SHOULDN’T be quite if you want to. (You don’t owe UN-prettiness to feminism, in other words.) quite is pleasant, as well as fun, as well as satisfying, as well as makes people smile, frequently even at you. however in the hierarchy of importance, quite stands a number of rungs down from happy, is method below healthy, as well as if done as a penance, or an obligation, can be so far away from independent that you may have to squint truly difficult to see it in the haze.

But what does you-don’t-have-to-be-pretty imply in practical, daily terms? It implies that you don’t have to apologize for using things that are held to be “unflattering” or “unfashionable” — particularly if, in fact, they make you pleased on some level deeper than just being quite does. So what if your preferred color isn’t a “good” color on you? So what if you are “too fat” (by some arbitrary measure) for a sleeveless top? If you are clean, are covered sufficient to prevent a citation for public indecency, as well as have bandaged any type of open wounds, you can wear any type of color or style you please, if it makes you happy.

I was going to make a useful prettiness decision tree, however quite much the end of every branch was a bubble that stated “tell complainers to go to hell” so it wasn’t much of a tool.

Pretty, it’s unfortunate to say, can have a shelf life. It’s so connected up with youth that, at some point (if you’re lucky), you’re going to have to graduate from pretty. in some cases (as in the situation with Diana Vreeland, above, you can go so far past quite that you end up in stylish, or even striking (or the fashion-y term jolie laide) before you understand it. however you won’t get there if you believe you have to comply with all the indications that state “this method to Pretty.” You get there by traveling the path you discover many interesting. (And to hell with the naysayers who state “But that’s not PRETTY”!)

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